Self-Esteem and Our Children
I came across some wonderful sites today and thought I would share them with you. The general theme is to think 
positively, act positively and that example will help our children do the same. It encourages self-esteem and self-worth. And, isn’t this part of our job as parents?
Often times, our children emulate us, whether we want them to or not. Having low self-worth and/or low self-esteem can be very damaging to our own children. It passes that quality on leading to bad decisions down the road. Perhaps they start choosing the wrong friends, or their grades start to suffer…eventually leading to choosing a poor job that makes them unhappy, or getting married to the wrong person because they didn’t think they could do any better.
It’s not always easy. It starts with us. We cannot teach it without already feeling it. If we don’t work on our own confidence first we cannot work on our child’s/children’s. It has been said: “An effort made for the happiness of others lifts us above ourselves,” (Mrs. Lydia Maria Child).
As stated in so many ways in the following links, imparting positivity is the best gift we can give our children through exhibiting our own self-esteem. Here are some ideas on how to “Pay it Forward”.
Thanks to Mom it Forward for their very inspiring post called “The Positivity Project: Teaching Kids Self-Esteem”
Thanks to Operation Beautiful for their inspiring blog about posting anonymous notes in public places for other women to see, spreading positivity and inspiring self-worth.
Be sure to check out Operation Beautiful’s articles under “Change the way you see – Not the way you look”.
Thank you and remember, YOU ARE TRULY BEAUTIFUL!
Importance of Bedtime Routines
I’ve written about it over and over, and I cannot stress enough how important a bedtime routine is for children. But, it’s not always possible to achieve a true “routine” before bed. We experience issues on evenings when one or both of my sons’ have a sports practice or game especially. All within a matter of 4-5 hours, you have to cram in a snack or two, dinner, homework, practice or game if they’re in sports, a bath, and if you’re lucky a book. This can be quite a challenge.
As told in the Parenting.com article on “14 Happy Bedtime Rituals” there is no one-size-fits-all bedtime routine when it comes to your own child. Some of these ideas work and some may not. It all depends on your child’s personality and what their needs are. What is important is that you do try some of these suggestions. It will make your child sleep more soundly and wake up refreshed and ready for a new day.
Some suggestions are:
- Bath
- Read a book (this is a must)
- Lullaby – Music has been known to calm & soothe the most distraught child…Read More About Music HERE
- Snuggle (which I am a big fan of!)
You can also read more about bedtime routines on my blog. Just creating a routine each night will help your family have a calm evening together.
Good luck and sleep well!
Rae Lynn @ Kidz Comfort
Safely from Crib to Bed
One of the most frustrating and trying times of child rearing can be the transition from crib to bed. It is stressful for the child and for the parent(s). Don’t get discouraged….it may take some time, but it is well worth discovering what will work best to help your child cope with this major milestone in their lives.
As a Mom of two boys that are very close in age (only 15 months apart) and with two VERY VERY different personalities, it was quite clear from the beginning that I would need to come up with two clever ways to help our boys through the variety of “firsts” that were coming. One, I will call “spirited” and the other more “easy going”.
What they did have in common was the desire to choose their surroundings, including the bed bumper for big kids that I had designed especially for them.
If you are looking for ideas to make your child’s transition a little more smooth, calm and positive, just check out some of the previous posts I have written regarding a safe bedtime routine for kids…
Dr. Sears, of Parenting.com has some great ideas as well.
Whatever methods you choose, just make sure your child is not stressed and remember that they will eventually embrace their new surroundings.
Sleep well!
-Rae Lynn at Kidzcomfort.com
Dangers of Internet Slang for Kids
Why Chat Room Lingo?
Kids these days are learning far more at an earlier age than their parents did. Although most kids are introduced to computers in grade school, it is more typical that these kids have already been navigating the World-Wide Web for a long time before that in their own homes. This is progress and can be a positive thing, but parents need to be on top of what their kids are doing online at all times.
You might be like some parents who view the computer as a foreign object. Though it is a useful and mostly harmless object, it can hurt your kids if you don’t monitor what they are doing on it. Part of learning about the Internet is just getting online, looking around and using common sense. Take a class to become more familiar with the computer and cyberspace if that’s what it takes.
Online, kids have their own language when they talk with friends in chat rooms and on the boards (that’s message boards). Unlike the language they use with their friends every day, the online chat room lingo needs a translation. Call it Internet slang, text slang, or chat slang, all of those three, four, and five letter abbreviations have meanings and some will be defined here.
Why do you need to learn about Internet slang?
As you probably are already aware, everyone on the Internet is not who they say they are. A certain amount of mystery can be liberating when chatting online, but as discussed in one of my previous blog posts, “5 Guidelines for Safe Computer Use at Home” it is also a way for predators to get in contact with your child. Predators learn the lingo to make it easier for them to pretend they are a 14-year old boy or girl and attract your son or daughter, even if in reality that person is a 50-year old man.
As a parent, you can also learn to decipher what your child is saying to their new friends online. Some of the lingo borders on sexually explicit. If your kids have never been exposed to that kind of Internet slang, or the person on the other end shows an interest in them, that lingo can be used to lure them away from your home and you. You can also find reliable software out there to monitor your child’s activity online for you.
Internet Slang, Unmasked
Here are some of the more common abbreviations that kids use:
- POS – Parent Over Shoulder
- P911 – My Parents are in the room
- GAL – Get A Life
- CYAL8R – See Ya Later
- LOL – Laughing Out Loud
- ROFL – Rolling On the Floor Laughing
- JTLYK – Just To Let You Know
- ILY – I Love You
- SWAK – Sealed With A Kiss
- H&K – Hugs and Kisses
- F2F – Face To Face
- A/S/L or ASL – Age/Sex/Location?
- ADN – Any Day Now
- B/F or BF – Boyfriend
- G/F or GF – Girlfriend
- WTGP? – Want to go private (meet in a private chat room)
There are a host of other abbreviations and some are quite explicit. You can find a more complete list here: http://www.web-friend.com/help/lingo/chatslang.html. The previous list is just to get you started. Predators sometimes ask for personal meetings and for personal information about your child, so it is important to know what ASL means. Disgustingly enough, they may even consider your child their love interest.
Kids generally think they are immortal and that they wouldn’t be fooled by some one online, and using Internet slang is their own secret code to keep parents away, but don’t let it. They could be getting into more trouble than you or they realize and you can help to prevent it by knowing what they are doing online.
Come back in a few days and read about Webcams and Online Safety.
Also,
for occasional reminders of other fantastic articles, reviews and parenting conversation.
Sleep Well!
raelynn @ Kidz Comfort
5 Ways to Handle Cyber Bullying
Socially speaking, going to school can be a minefield. Granted, your child is there to learn but school is where they spend the majority of their day and the reality is that they will have to learn to interact with other kids. Sometimes part of the social scene can include bullying. In this day and age, when some of this bullying is happening online, this distasteful act is called cyber bullying.
Cyber bullying is defined as the use of online tools to harass someone. The harassment can take on so many different forms. It can be threatening messages, unwanted pornographic material, hate crimes and impersonating some one else just to name a few. Cyber bullying is conducted through social websites, email messages, IM messages and chat rooms. The cyper bully uses these means to terrorize another person and harm them with or without laying a finger on them.
This form of torture has become a real concern. I’m sure you’ve seen such stories in the news lately. It’s bad enough when kids get pushed around and bullied in school by people who don’t like them or who want to pick on them for no real reason. Online, the audience is much larger. Someone who doesn’t even know your child could participate, just because they find it exciting. As a parent, you are not powerless. You probably know your child better than anyone so use that to your advantage and educate you kids about cyber bullying. Here are some tips to help:
- Talk to your child often. Frequently communicating with your child will alert you when something even slightly changes in their behavior. If your child is normally a happy outgoing child who turns withdrawn may have something going on. Talk to them about cyber bullying before it starts and let them know they can confide in you about anything.
- Keep threatening messages. If your child does become a victim of cyber bullying, keep copies of all “evidence” for possible future use. Your ISP can trace the messages and find where they originated. For most ISPs, explicit or threatening messages are against their operating policies and they may keep a very close watch for them.
- Teach your child how to deal with the situation. First of all, make sure you and your child do not respond to the messages. It will only provoke the sender. Getting into a fight is not going to solve the problem either. Ask your child if they know how the whole situation began. If your child is psychologically affected by the bullying, a counselor could help your child to deal with the harassment. And, as always, just be there for your child. As you know, a parent’s love and support does make a huge difference in any situation, especially a negative one. Amazon.com has a highly rated book to help with educating a teen on the topic of cyber bullying called Cyber-Safe Kids, Cyber-Savvy Teens: Helping Young People Learn To Use the Internet Safely and Responsibly
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- Call the police. When the bullying and harassment take on a threatening tone or involves pornography, call or visit the police station and file a report. They can use their resources to find the offending person. Even if they can’t pinpoint the person who originated the messages, they can trace them to a household and investigate it further.
- Don’t let your child become a part of the problem. Many times kids think that talking bad about someone online is harmless not realizing that there is always someone on the receiving end who is probably terrified. Discuss the effects of cyber bullying and the consequences if they are caught doing it.
Cyber bullying is a very real threat to kids. It is happening on a daily basis and often ends in tragedy. It can obviously destroy lives. You can help by taking precautions to prevent it as much as possible and learning to handle the situation if it occurs with your child.
There are so many resources out there on the topic of cyber bullying. Here are some of my recommendations for teachers, parents and children:
Cyber Bullying: Bullying in the Digital Age
Bullying Beyond the Schoolyard: Preventing and Responding to Cyberbullying
Also, here are some great links to other cyber bullying resources online:
Come back soon and learn more about the lingo in chat rooms, in texting and other social tools.
Sleep Well!
raelynn @ Kidz Comfort
5 Things Kids Should Know about Social Sites
By now, you’ve heard terms like Facebook, MySpace, YouTube and Twitter, right? If you haven’t, I guarantee your kids have heard of them or are currently even using them. These are just a few of the social networking sites out there where kids can meet others and create their own personal page to tell everyone who they are. Before letting your kids participate on these or any other social sites, let them know that with a few added precautions, they’ll stay safe.
No one wants to rob their child of some of these childhood experiences out there. It can also be hard for some kids to believe that anyone would be out to hurt them. But, the world can be a dangerous place. And, because they are not adults yet, they rely on you to educate them about how to be aware of what is going on around them. Child predators are counting on their innocence as a way to trap them. You can speak with your kids without scaring them. Just keep them informed of certain safety measures.
- Don’t give out any personal information to anyone. Kids feel excited to meet new people online, but it could be that the person posing as your child’s new “friend” is actually a sexual predator. They will coax information out of your child over time, and innocently your child will give them the info they want. With a name and address or even a name and a high school, a predator can locate and stalk a child.
- Don’t agree to meet with any online friends without parents present. Luring is the term used for online predators that use social sites to convince kids to leave their home and meet them somewhere else. It is much harder to catch the predator if a child goes out to meet them instead of the predator showing up on your doorstep. When a “friend” wants to meet with your child, always use your best judgment and always go along, should you even decide to let them meet someone they’ve met online.
- Avoid sexual conversations. A sexual predator won’t come right out and ask your child sexually explicit questions. They start by gaining their trust and then easing into those types of conversations. You should tell your child not to talk inappropriately and also not to tell their online “friend” what they look like.
- Always be honest. Pretending to be someone other than who they are can get your child into trouble. Acting older can attract the wrong kind of person and unwanted situations. Also, talking badly about someone else could backfire on them. Teach your children to remain respectful and honest at all times.
- Never ever give out passwords. Believe this or not, a friend could use your password and log in pretending to be you in a chat room or other social site. It might seem like a harmless prank but could lead to major problems for your child. Someone who is angry with your child could use their profile and say or do bad things.
You want to protect your child’s right to act their age, but take the proper precautions. Just remember to teach them to be safe in online situations so they don’t become a victim.
Here is a highly rated recommendation and great resource for families that want to stay safe: How to Protect Your Children on the Internet: A Road Map for Parents and Teachers
Come back in a couple days for more about Online Safety and Internet Safety for Kids. Sign up for our RSS feed, or join our email list to receive notices of new topics in our blog.
Sleep well!
raelynn @ KidzComfort.com
5 Guidelines for Safe Computer Use at Home
Some of you may remember that there was once a time when computers took up an entire room. Now, almost every household has at least one. Between our old clunkers and newer replacements, we have five computers! Even if you have only one computer (desktop or laptop) in your home and the kids have access to it, it will be worth your while to implement a few guidelines to keep them safe while on the Internet.
Everyone in your household values their privacy. As your kids get older, their desire for privacy grows and grows. If you have teenagers this is most likely a big issue for you now. When it comes to online communication, their safety should come first, whether they understand it or not. You lock your home’s door to protect your family, but unfortunately these predators have found another way to get in – through your computer.
How can you be sure to protect your kids when they are online just as you do when you are inside your home? Here are 5 important ways to make computer time for your children safe and give you some much needed peace of mind too.
1. Communicate with your children. This is one of the most important lines of defense against child predators. Open and clear communication creates an atmosphere of trust in the home. Just explain that the Internet can be dangerous and that certain safeguards are set up for their protection. This also means that you shouldn’t overreact if they slip up. Kids are naturally curious and a slip-up or two is to be expected and dealt with calmly and in an understanding way.
2. Keep computers in a common area. When a child is using the computer behind closed doors it is much harder to keep track of what they are seeing and doing. In an area where there is traffic, such as the family room or den, you can walk by or be in the same room while they are online. If you do allow a computer in their bedroom for school work, the door must always remain open while they are using it. This will usually keep most curious kids from viewing explicit pages since they know their parents might walk by and spot them.
3. Set up parental controls on computers. Kids of all ages know how to use the Internet now. My kids could navigate the internet and get to their learning sites by the time they were going into Kindergarten! Parental controls can stop them from (unknowingly or not) accessing pages that have potential adult content on them. You can also install highly rated software such as CyberPatrol Parental Controls 7.7
4. Teach kids not to send personal information to others. Some membership sites, such as social networking sites (among many other sites) ask kids to enter personal information to sign up for contests or just to use the website. When your child gives out any information about themselves, it can lead a predator right to your front door. There are many sites out there that are just a setup to gain access to your child. Your kids should ask you before filling out any questionnaires or forms online that require any personal information.
5. Filter email accounts. Email is a very common way for pornographic or other non-kid friendly messages to be sent. Allow your kids (with your help) to add their friends’ email addresses to their address book, but block all others. This will keep them from receiving and opening emails from people they don’t know and possibly seeing things that they shouldn’t. Safe Eyes Parental Control Suite
Online safety begins at home. What your kids learn from you will help to keep them and your whole family safe from online predators. Then, when they are away from home, you wont have to be concerned.
Here are some great resources from Amazon.com:
Cyber-Safe Kids, Cyber-Savvy Teens: Helping Young People Learn To Use the Internet Safely and Responsibly
How to Protect Your Children on the Internet: A Road Map for Parents and Teachers
Come back in a couple days for more about Online Safety and Internet Safety for Kids. Sign up for our RSS feed, or join our email list to receive notices of new topics in our blog.
Sleep well!
raelynn @ KidzComfort.com
Nintendo Wii Fit Plus Review
Let me start by saying that like most people, I have a hectic schedule. I work part-time, I own a business and I have two very young boys. I have a hard time going to the gym and for several reasons….I like being home, I don’t really enjoy exercising, I get bored, it’s too much time away from my family…the excuses are endless when it comes to being fit. I even have an elliptical machine at home so that I can do some cardio, but even that is a struggle for me.
As I hit my 40’s I’ve noticed that my body is not what it used to be. I’m sure you can relate…as we get older, some things just don’t look or work the same. Well, my issue is with my back and neck. I was frequently stiff and often times pulled muscles just by bending or moving the wrong way.
It was time to begin a routine that would stop this stiffness, muscle aches and pains.
I swore up and down that I would not give in and allow my kids to start playing video games at such a young age. After all, they are only 5 and 6 years old. There will be plenty of time to let them become video addicts.
Well, guess what “Santa” brought this year! A Wii!
To my surprise, I am enjoying it sooo much. With some extra Christmas money that our family received we went out and purchased Wii Fit Plus. I LOVE IT!
Wii Fit Plus with Balance Board
When we first purchased the Wii Fit Plus I set up my profile and added a goal for myself. Not a hard one, but one that I could actually attain. All this is done directly through WFP (Wii Fit Plus). I also created a routine that I felt I could handle and then modify as I got better at it.
Each morning, I turn on my WFP and do my body analysis. It tracks my progress and tells me what I need to do to meet my goal. It measures my BMI, weight, and can even track my calories.
I then head over to my personal trainer and do the routine that I had set up for myself. It is 30 minutes of stretching yoga poses and also strength training. After that, I do some aerobic activities that are also a lot of fun: Hula Hoop, rhythm boxing, step aerobics, etc.
Besides the great routines you can set up, you can also do tons of balancing and coordination games. From ski jumping, snow ball fighting, soccer heading, skateboarding, biking, running, Segway racing…the list goes on and on.
The best part is that my kids are exercising along with me. They aren’t just sitting on the couch with a controller. They are up and moving around. Our whole family has Wii nights now where we compete in tennis, baseball, bowling and more.
I cannot say enough about it. It was well worth the money. I wake up with much more energy, my back is no longer stiff and sore and my balance is better, making my posture better as well.
So, if you still have doubts, send me a note and I’ll tell you everything I’ve experienced so far with our own Wii Fit Plus.
Best money we have spent in a long time.
Here is another review of the Wii Fit Plus with Balance Board
Thanks!
-raelynn @ Kidz Comfort
PS: There are affiliate links within this email, so keep in mind that if you actually purchase a Wii Fit Plus through the links included above, I will receive a very small commission. This is not why I wrote the post though….I truly do LOVE my Wii Fit Plus!
Bed Bumper for Big Kids Winner Announcement!
We have a Kidz Comfort Winner!!!
Our contest ran from June 8th to June 14th. We have determined our winner with the help of Random.org.
Congratulations to Marla, who will have her choice of either a Bed Bumper for Big Kids or a Toddler Size Pillow, compliments of Kidz Comfort!
I love my Bed Bumper!
We would still love to hear from you…check out our site and tell us how we could improve. Whether it is a larger selection, more variety for each product, website navigation, or anything else…we’d love to hear your ideas and opinions.
Read more about why Toddler Size Pillows may be the right choice for your child: Read Full Story
Read more about Bed Bumpers for Big Kids and their benefits: Read Full Story
Post Strep Glomerulonephritis
Did you know that the strep virus has a large number of strains, and pretty harmful ones at that? I didn’t, but my family found out the hard way!
My 4-year old son had been sick for roughly a week with a stomach bug, causing vomiting with no fever. Of course, we made sure he did not get dehydrated by giving him small amounts of water and apple juice or Gatorade. We also stuck with the BRAT diet of Bananas, Rice, Apples and Toast. We got past it and things seemed ok.
After he recovered, his face looked different…but we couldn’t place what the difference was. We thought perhaps he was tired from all the sickness the week before.
He got home from pre-school one day and in a voice that sounded excited and curious, he said “Mommy, my pee is orange”. Hmmm, could he have eaten something in pre-school that did this? They did have a party that day, so maybe the cake frosting did this? He wasn’t in any discomfort or pain at all. It sounded a bit like a bladder or urinary tract infection to me.
We started to “inspect” him all over while giving him a bath that night. His belly was distended, almost looking like a slightly pregnant belly. Again, he was happy, cheery, playful and in no pain.
He went to sleep like normal and in the morning I took him to the doctor’s office. They did a urine test and found his protein level to be very high. They sent us directly to the ER. We spent the next seven hours in the emergency room, waiting to meet with the Nephrologist, and unsure of exactly what was going on. At this point he was more obviously swollen and his urine looked like ice tea. Very concerning to say the least.
We were sent home and told to come back the following afternoon to go over some of the blood tests and another urinalysis.
He woke up with his right eye almost swollen shut. Still as cheery as ever and more annoyed by the fact that he couldn’t completely open his eye.
At the doctor’s office, we received some unnerving news. They weren’t sure what this was, but it was affecting his kidneys, causing the blood in his urine and the retaining of fluid. They scheduled him for a KIDNEY BIOPSY…Oh My Goodness! This is serious!
We are sent home, and my husband and I (stupidly) begin googling his syptoms, checking WebMD.com and finding a list of possible diagnoses from leukemia to a simple infection. Of course, what do we automatically think but the worse case scenario.
We don’t quite make it past the weekend as his symptoms worsen. His weight has now gone up 8 pounds in less than a week. He looks awful (still feels great though) and his urine is still reddish-brown. We call the doctor on call and are sent directly to Boston Children’s Hospital on a Sunday. He is immediately admitted due to blood pressure concerns now. We spend three days in the hospital while they try to stop the fluid retention and figure things out. He is put on a reduced fluid diet of only 20 ounces a day, including any fruit or other food containing fluid. He is also put on a diet of no salt and reduced sodium to help.
We are sent home, but readmitted two days later for the biopsy. The word “biopsy” scares the ^%$^# out of me. My husband and I felt so out of control and scared, I cannot even put it into words.
His final diagnosis…post strep glomerulonephritis. It is frightening…there is a strain of the strep virus that actually can impact the kidneys in some children. It is a fluke. You can carry this strain of strep and not have any symptoms, but certain children can come into contact with it and end up in the hospital. Left untreated for too long and it can actually lead to the need for a kidney transplant.
There are many many strains of strep most commonly affecting your throat and skin, however, in more serious cases can affect blood, heart, brain, spinal cord, intestinal tract, bladder, liver and KIDNEYS.
Our little boy was exposed to strep and showed no initial symptoms, such as a soar throat. His stomach virus was unrelated (strangely enough) but may have lowered his immune system. His prognosis is GREAT. He will follow with a Nephrologist periodically, and may have high amounts of protein in his urine for up to two years, but he has no permanent damage to his kidneys. We were fortunate.
Of course, like any virus or bacteria, the best way to avoid them is to wash your hands with soap for 20 seconds or more. Coughing and sneezing should be done into your arm and not into your hands. As adults, we can attempt to control what we are contracting and spreading to others. I know it gets a bit tougher with our kids, especially while they are in school. But, we can still teach them how important it is to wash our hands and not share drinks and other items that have been in other’s mouths.
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